Australia, what a concept...


I moved to Australia from the U.S. when I was fifty. The transition looked deceptively simple. After all, I’d visited there a half-dozen times, I knew my way around, and the Aussies speak English—how hard could it be? I quickly found there’s a big difference between being a tourist in a country and having to make a serious go of it. This blog covers what I had to learn the first few years in order to survive.
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Sunday, August 31, 2008

West Australian Elections



PERTH, Western Australia
Parlimentary elections are in their final week here in WA, and they are getting wild and wooly. The current Premier (state governor) has been running a Chicago-style machine apparatus for the last 2 years, since he was handed the job when his predecessor resigned do to "depression". Now not only are the parties fighting dirty against each other for votes, but the ministers within the Premier's party (Labor) are already fighting for survival in the new (assuming they win) Government.

FYI: Labor is the equivalent of the US Democrats. The equivalent of the US Republicans is called--get this--the Liberals. This refers to liberal economic policy, not social policy. So, Labor is liberal and the Liberals aren't. Typical Aussie contrary thinking.

Other parties are the Greens (environmental and social left-wing), Family First (religious right), the Nationals (rural and country), and the Democrats (who's motto is "we keep the bastards honest"). The Nationals and the Liberals form a Coalition to counter Labor's majority.

Newman Iron Mine Mill

Issues in the election: banning uranium mining, not allowing genetically modified crops, managing the mining and energy boom economic windfalls, prohibiting new drivers to operate cars with V8 engines, corruption and lobbyest influence, managing development of the Perth metro area.

The election is Sept 6. More on the unique way votes are counted in the next blog.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Remembering Bernie Mac


This has little to do with Australia, but I was working on the Bernie Mac Show the year we were applying for Australian migration. In fact most of my DIMA forms were written in the camera office next to Bernie's dressing room.

Bernie died this week. He was only 50. He was a very nice, sweet, caring man. That might not seem like the edgy, politically incorrect image he projected, but that was truly what he was: funny, irreverant, but thoroughly decent. He told the truth the about life the way he saw it. He never forgot his roots but enjoyed his accomplishments and the position in life he'd achieved. A real loss, he had a lot more to give the world. Last time I saw him was when I visited the set our first trip back to the US in '04. He remembered me, invited me into his dressing room. He put on his oxygen tubes and wanted to know how I'd been. He was truly larger than life. He loved to walk around the set singing in his falsetto: "You can stick it in the crack of yo' ass..." I can still hear him. I'll miss him. If there is a heaven I'll look forward to seeing him again...and having a good laugh.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

4th of July on June 29th


Had a table selling my book at the American Womens' Club of Perth 4th of July picnic on 6-29, held then because the 4th isn't a holiday in Australia. Australians celebrate Australia Day on January 26, during the southern summer, usually with a picnic and a sky show (fireworks), and consumption of copious amounts of brew and alchopops (fruit and hard liquor in a can which goes down much too easy, but that's for another post).


Met lots of ex-pats at the picnic, young and old, long timers and new comers, including Ken Churn, the US Consul to W. Australia. Many are married to Aussies, others are in WA for work: BHP, Chevron, etc. Others are like me, rat-race dropouts. Nice to see so many Yanks.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Jumping Off to Vanuatu




One of the great things about living in Australia is that it's a great jumping-off point for exploring SE Asia and the S. Pacific. Last week I shot a doco (Aussie for documentary) for Oz Downunder in Vanuatu (the former New Hebrides), including a segment on how the islanders are eradicating the Crown of Thorns starfish that threatens the reefs. Tucked in the warm, clear S. Pacific between New Caledonia and Fiji, it's where Michener wrote Tales of the South Pacific. A diver's paradise: incredible corals, fish life, wrecks (including the largest divable wreck in the world: the SS President Coolidge which hit a mine and sank just off the beach off Luganville) in 80 degree water and up to 100' viz. Vanuatuans are the friendliest folks on the planet. And it's all only a short flight from Brisbane. Special thanks to Peter of Sailaway Cruises in Poet Vila, Charmane of Coral Quays hotel on Santo, Allan, Tony and Alfred of Allan Power Diving in Luganville, and the people of the village of Laonamoa on the island of Pele. And a special compliment to the US Peace Corps volunteers I met over there, doing a terriffic job and having a good time doing it.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Business: Identification

To open a bank account, to apply for a driver’s license, or to enter into other bureaucratic situations, you’ll need ID. Identification has been formalized into a 100 Points System, i.e. you’ll be required to produce 100 points of identification. Your passport is worth 70 points, a driver’s license is 40 points, a credit card or a Medicare card is 25 points, and a video store rental card (I’m not making this up) is 25 points. Utility bills are 20 points. One reason for this is so only legal residents can open bank accounts.

If you’re migrating and don’t already have your own Australian bank account, you can wire money to a friend or relative in Australia. If it’s a large amount, they can open an account in their name and list it In Trust to your name. However, beware: they may have to show it on their taxes. Don’t do this if the money will be in their account at the end of the tax year, June 30th.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Dressing for Business

Australians are casual dressers, but they dress up for business.

Business suits are common in the CBD (Central Business District) for lawyers, accountants, and businessmen. This is usually a two-piece or vested suit, black or with an understated stripe, four-button or double breasted. Once in the office, the coat generally comes off, but the tie stays on.

Engineers and less-formal white collar workers will wear slacks and a pressed, button-front shirt. Ties are rare.

Many workers who come into contact with the public wear uniform shirts. Real estate reps, bank workers, etc., wear ironed, button-front shirts or blouses with the company logo embroidered on the breast—name tags are common. Salespeople, counter clerks, car dealers, etc., wear golf or polo shirts with printed or embroidered logos on the breast. The color is usually the same for everyone in a particular shop, so finding a salesperson is easier. One reason for the widespread use of uniform shirts is because Aussies are very casual dressers, and with required uniforms they are forced to dress presentably.

Tradesmen will commonly wear hi-vis (florescent) yellow, lime, or orange-colored shirts, for high visibility and safety. This is especially true for truckies, heavy machinery operators, road crews, or construction workers. These will commonly have logos on the breast and are UV-resistant (the southern sun is merciless). Shorts are common for working men. Blokes (men) under forty wear long ones that go below the knee. Older blokes wear them short, just below the bum (butt).

Monday, May 19, 2008

Business: Banking in Australia

The major banks are ANZ (pronounced A-N-Zed), Westpac, National, and Commonwealth. They’re known as the Big Four. There are also smaller banks and credit unions. Most banks seem to follow a Monty Python approach to business and bureaucracy, so come armed with patience. If you don’t like the first answer you get, ask someone else (in Australia, an organization is truly a group of individuals). Just when you think everybody there is hopeless, someone will come through for you.

The equivalent of a U.S. Certificate of Deposit (CD) is called a Term Deposit (TD). Checks are spelled cheques. Fees are charged on most transactions.

In Australia, there’s no insurance on savings equivalent to the U.S. FSLIC or FDIC, but under the Banking Act of 1959, depositors in an Authorised Deposit-taking Institution (ADI) have to maintain assets to back their deposits (be it land, gold, cattle, etc.) and in the event that the bank goes belly up, the depositors are to be repaid first—before the bank’s creditors. What does this mean to you? If the bank fails, you won’t be paid out directly, but will have to wait in line and hope there’s enough to go around. Bottom line: all money deposited is on faith in that institution, so it seems prudent to go with one of the big ones and learn to put up with the frustration. Besides, they usually have more ATMs.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Business: the shares (stock) market

Stocks are called shares, the stock market is the share market (also called the Bourse). Shares are traded through brokers and online brokerages (such as banks, etc.), just as in the U.S.
The Australian Shares Exchange is the ASX. All publicly traded companies are registered with ASICS (the Australian Securities and Investments Commission) equivalent to the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. All securities traded online with the ASX are cleared and settled through CHESS (Clearing House Electronic Sub-register System), which is owned by ASTC, the Australian Stock Exchange Settlement and Transfer Corporation, which is owned by the ASX. Details are on www.investasutralia.gov.au.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Australian Business: Land Ownership

Methods of land ownership Freehold, leasehold and Crown land are the basis of land ownership in Australia.

Freehold means privately-owned land. This can be bought and sold.

Crown land is government-owned land and can be used for parks, utilities, airports, government facilities, granted to individuals or corporations, sold as freehold land, or leased. The Crown originally referred to the Royal Family, but it now applies to any government land ownership, be it state or federal. The land is held in the right of the Crown, and the Crown has legal rights as an individual land owner. About half of all Australian land is Crown land, including ninety-three percent of Western Australia.

Leasehold is where an individual or corporation buys a long-term lease on Crown land, usually ninety-nine years, and can treat the lands as if they owned it privately. Throughout the interior, huge tracts consisting of hundreds of square miles of Crown land are leased as cattle and sheep stations. The backbone of the economy—the mining industry—is entirely on leased land.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Small country on a big lot.

You've gotta love living in a country of only 21 million people. Since moving here in 2003, I've become involved in the community doing some land-preservation activism, and helping with my kids' high school Parents & Citizens group (equiv. of PTA) . Through these activities I've had the opportunity to meet with several members of the State Parliament, including both of the last two oppostition leaders and the previous Premier (equiv. of a state governor). I've also met with several members of the Federal Parliament, and last week had the opportunity to meet the Deputy Prime Minister, Julia Guillard (equiv. of the U.S. Vice President--just try to get close to Dick Cheney). Not bad for only being in the country five years.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Shark Bay Adventure

Just returned from a week on Shark Bay, a day's drive north of Perth on the west coast. We towed the boat up and ran the shallow waters of the bay. Swam with dozens of manta rays and dolphins, scuba'd with tropicals on coral reefs, and spent half a dive with a potato cod larger than myself; on the surface saw turtles, dugongs and sea eagles. Climate change is effecting the bay, recent cylcones have buried some reefs in sand while removing the beaches from several promomtories. Had some great dinners in Denham: at The Old Pearler, a restaurant made of blocks of naturally occuring compressed seashells, and at The Old Jetty where we had Mango Snapper with crusted prawns. It was my fifth trip to Shark Bay, it just keeps getting better.

Monday, April 7, 2008

Use the 1500 word Australian-American dictionary for FREE

We've posted our entire searchable Aussie-American dictionary on yankeeshout.com . This is the most complete compilation of Australian terms and phrases available, and it's for free, along with some nice photos and a primer on Australianisms.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

“Are you from Canada?”

When Aussies pick up on your “North American” accent, they will likely ask if you’re from Canada, not if you’re from the U.S. This is partly because they run into more Canadians than Americans, but mostly it’s because they know Canadians are sensitive to being mistaken for Americans, while Americans don’t care.

As for Americans: when asked that question, don’t be offended, it’s a great opportunity to strike up a conversation. Outside of tourist areas, Americans are a novelty.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Beer

Australia is famous for beer—drinking it, as well as making it. Amongst some social classes, beer is almost a religion. Beer drinkers tend to be loyal to their brew.

One major misconception is that all Australians drink Foster’s. Chalk that one up to advertising—in America. Fact is, you rarely see Foster’s, except in Queensland, though you see a lot of Foster’s products: VB (Victoria Bitter), Crownies (Crown Lager), Carlton, Sterling, Cascade, etc. The Foster’s you get in North America is actually made in Canada (read the label, mate).

Other major beers are XXXX (called 4X) from Queensland, Swan Lager from Western Australia, Boags from Tasmania, Tooheys from New South Wales, Victoria Bitter (VB) from Victoria, and many more. There are many smaller brewers, like Western Australia’s Little Creatures and South Australia’s Coopers, plus micro breweries, like Feral, Bootleg, and Mountain Goat. Hundreds of boutique breweries have sprung up throughout the country, each making their own brew to their own recipes, served fresh to locals and tourists.

Domestic beer isn’t cheap—about twice the U.S. price. You can expect to pay A$30–50 for a carton (case), or A$12–15 for a six-pack, depending on the brand. If you hanker for the taste of home, Budweiser, Miller, and Corona are available as expensive imports, along with many beers from Europe. When it comes to a good brew what’s a few dollars? Besides, one doesn’t buy beer; one just rents it for an hour or so...

Friday, March 7, 2008

Australian Time Zones

Sydney and Melbourne are two hours ahead of Perth and one-half hour ahead of Adelaide and Darwin. (Yes, there are half-hour time zones.)
During Australian Standard Time, late April to late October (exact dates vary from state to state):
When it’s 12 noon in Sydney, it’s:
12 noon in Melbourne, Canberra, Hobart, and Brisbane,
11:30 a.m. in Adelaide and Darwin,
10:00 a.m. in Perth.
During Australian daylight savings time, October to April (exact dates vary from state to state):
When it’s 12 noon in Sydney, it’s:
12 noon in Melbourne, Canberra, and Hobart,
11:30 a.m. in Adelaide,
11:00 a.m. in Brisbane,
10:30 a.m. in Darwin,
10:00 a.m. in Perth.
Obviously, this gets confusing. It’s possible for it to simultaneously be eight-ten in Darwin and twenty minutes to nine in Brisbane.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Egalitarianism

Egalitarianism is a belief that all people are equal. This is an underlying attitude in Australia and the basis of the fair go. A white Australian might complain about the “aboriginal problem” or about the influx of migrants from the third world, but then include several of each as friends. This is because the Aussie tends to take each person on his or her own merits and character. It’s said that it doesn’t matter how much money a man makes, what counts is whether he’s a good mate and can spin a good yarn at a party.
This egalitarianism is most evident along the foreshores. Australians love the water, and everybody wants to live next to it—be it a brook, river, bay, or the ocean. Now this might be a bit of a shocker, but with few exceptions, in an Australian city you cannot live on a beach, bay, or river.
You can live across the street from the water, but there will always be a road in front of you. There are a few exceptions: some very old blocks (lots) established before the zoning laws changed, manmade canals in waterside developments, and property far from a city—but in ninety-nine percent of Australian urbanized areas, you can’t build directly next to the water.
Why? Water features are considered public property, and institutional egalitarianism mandates access for all. The government has eliminated the possibility of having a wall of rich people’s houses blocking ordinary folks from the water, as has happened in California and Florida.
This makes for an odd juxtaposition. You can buy a million-dollar block along the coast, build your million-dollar dream house on it, and as you sit on your veranda watching the sunset, sipping your chardonnay and nibbling beluga, some poor battler without a pot to piss in can drive up in his rusted old Ford Falcon, park across the street blocking your view, stumble barefoot down to the beach, beer in hand, and enjoy the same sunset. That’s egalitarianism.

Attitudes about Americans

Living outside the U.S. but constantly observing it gives one an international perspective. What strikes one is how inwardly fixated the American people are. They seem to ignore what’s going on beyond their shores unless it intrudes directly and obviously—such as the 9-11 attack. Like Narcissus staring at herself in the mirrored pool, Americans see international realities as something out of focus, floating in the background of their own reflection.
Australians generally like Americans. They watch our movies and TV shows, listen to the music, and read the books, but they don’t quite get why Americans work so hard and are so over the top: hyperactive, aggressive, and determined to boss the world around
Aussies are more relaxed. The prevailing attitude is “she’ll be right” and the answer to any question is usually “no worries.” Personal freedom is the most important issue, and anything that compromises that is a hard sell.

“You’re on your own, mate.”

Australians are very independent people. They don’t like to meddle in other people’s business and they expect no one to meddle in theirs. This is part of the Fair Go attitude that is deeply ingrained in the Australian psyche: everyone deserves a chance, a “fair go”. A fair go is an opportunity to succeed or fail on your own. It’s yours; a gift from the Australian people. Good luck with it.

The down-side of this is, don’t expect people to offer you help or advice—you’re on your own, mate. If you do ask for help, people will generally be glad to assist—in a reserved way—but part of your problem as a new arrival is that you won’t know which questions to ask, or even that there is a question. Keep this book handy. It’s the Operator’s Manual for Australia.